Being Bi-Polar in Paradise

CostaRicaI recently spent several weeks solo-backpacking the beautiful South American country of Costa Rica.

This was my very first time out of the U.S., with the exception of the Bahamas.  I turned 46 while on this amazing journey, I have raised my kids, I am a single woman, and I am hungry for adventure.  I am a bit of a gypsy-nomad.  😉

But I have also “suffered” from Bi-Polar disorder most of my life.  I put that word in quotes because I don’t technically consider it suffering anymore.  There was once a time when I did, for sure.  But I have learned many things over the years, and one of them is how to manage my emotions.  I have worked very hard to try and keep an “even keel”, and not fall victim to the extreme high’s and low’s that accompany this mental condition.

What did this look like for an extended international trip, where one is in a country that does not speak one’s native tongue??  It was QUITE interesting.  And it really did come into play in the dynamics of traversing the landscape and the culture.

Some days, I was feeling UP.  I would feel like I could take on the world.  As a “for instance”, on one of my UP days, I happened to be staying at a hostel with people from Germany, France, and of course the Costa Rican “Tico” hosts.  I was feeling so “spry”, I actually went downstairs to the common area kitchen to see what was up for coffee that morning.  We were all in there at the same time.  On a “down” day, if I had peaked in, or listened in, I would have ran for the hills!!  (For those of you that don’t know, social anxiety is a BIG part of the down-side of the bi-polar two-sided coin.)

I felt pretty confident and friendly that day, and we all had a very fun time trying to communicate between so many language barriers.  And later that same day, I even accepted the invitation of the hostel manager’s brother to allow him to be my personal guide to the nearby waterfalls in Montezuma.  (Something I would NEVER even consider on a LOW day.)  I had a blast!

But THEN the suffering came…. lol.  I expended so much energy that day, that–no matter how much I didn’t want it to happen– I crashed the next day.  And stayed down the next… and the next.  I spent the next three days isolated in my little room, only coming out to use the common bathroom, and even then I would “sneak” over there when I figured out to the best of my abilities that no one else was “out there”…. Yikes!  What a silly mess I am!

The sweet lady who ran the hostel… when I finally DID emerge… thought maybe I had left!  I told her, “No… I’m just enjoying some quiet time just for ME.”  😉

That’s how the majority of the 6-week trip went down there for me.  Some UP day, mixed in with a lot more LOW days… but that’s ok.  I really do like to just be alone.  I enjoy walking, and just observing life happening all around me.  I don’t have a need to join in, I never feel lonely, and I don’t feel the need to do a lot of activities.  I’m more of the…. PENSIVE type, shall we say…  😉

Well, I hope this has helped someone somewhere.  If you suffer from Bi-Polar and/or Social Anxiety, I hope you know that you are not alone.  And I hope you know that life doesn’t have to be all suffering.  Acceptance of your disorder… no resistance… and working WITH it instead of against it, can all be very helpful.

I love you.  I really do.  XOXO

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Do Angels Wear Fur?

Picture this: I’m sitting on a deserted beach in Costa Rica… black sand, blue waters, sun approaching the horizon.… drinking in the breeze and the salty sea air….  When suddenly I notice a man walking toward me, with the distinct outline of a machete in his hand…!!!!!

Last fall, I spent 6 weeks solo back-packing in beautiful Costa Rica.

Some of my most amazing encounters there had an animal or two (or THREE) in them.

Did you know? Central America is full of stray dogs & cats? And in Costa Rica, there are even stray HORSES, apparently!!!!

I’m going to tell you of four such encounters: the ones that really blew my mind.

First, we have Chiquita. (I named my furry companions myself.) This was the cutest little mutt that “adopted me” on my walk along the nearly deserted Playa Negra (black sand beach) of Puerto Viejo.

She began to walk with me at the outset of my stroll. And boy, was I glad she was there! Backing up to the scene I just described.… there I am, enjoying a nice, quiet, tranquil evening, all ready to watch the sunset, when this man approached me with a machete! Chiquita was the first to become alert of his approach, & she began barking… & had me very cautious & aware of my surroundings.. (as in, where could I get help, if needed.) Luckily we weren’t too far away from town, & civilization. As he grew closer, my heart is leaping in my chest… & Chiquita calms down.  I took this as a good sign. Turned out, he only wanted to chop off the top of a fresh coconut, not my head! I bought a refreshing coconut for one coin: 500 Colones  (about $2 American), thanked him, and after he walked away, I decided maybe it was best for ME to high-tail it back to my hostel, and NOT be out after dark. (Lol). Chiquita walked me home, I thanked her, gave her some water,  & we bade farewell.

Just a day or two after that, I was walking along another deserted stretch of beach, working my way toward a little peninsula I wanted to explore, and these TWO strays began to hang out with me along my journey. These two were CRAZY! They were VERY active! At first I couldn’t tell if they were playing, or fighting, and I was very nervous because they were “all up in my business”. After a bit of watching them frolic all around me, in the waves, & with each other, I finally concluded they must be siblings, and were just play-fighting, so I calmed down a bit. Turns out, these two were also my saviors, just like Chiquita… for all of a sudden, off down the beach a ways, out of the jungle comes bounding a whole GANG of stray dogs… about six of them! I was the only one on the beach, so I could only assume they wanted to check me out—potentially attack me! What to do????!!!! Well, these two coo coos hanging out with me– I named them The Siblings– saved the day! They got in front of me, and took up positions of defense, & barked their heads off.  I was sooooo scared I was going to be in the middle of a HUGE dog fight! But their defense worked! The gang backed off, & went on their merry way to a different location. WHEW!  I sure loved those 2 kooky dogs after that! They got me safely to my destination.


Now, AT my destination, which was this nice, quiet city park that included a beach, I was taking a nap, when suddenly I was awakened by BIG OL hoof steps!  Yes… hoof steps! I sat right up, looked around in a daze, and to my bewilderment, there were 3 stray horses standing a few yards away from me!  WHAT?!?  They had no saddles, no harnesses, no leads, and no humans in SIGHT. I just stood there, amazed.  I had three little apples in my pack, so I tried to make friends with them, but they were clearly not having it, and I ended up tossing the apples their way.  But the leader of the pack ate ALL of them! GREEDY! Later that day, I saw them strolling the path along the beach again. And again, no human.  Super interesting!!!

My favorite story is of Choco, the chocolate Labrador dog, who adopted me on my epic hike to Cabo Blanco, near the end of my trip in Costa Rica.

This day was an incredible journey for me! At the end of the day, I ended up hiking & walking a total of about 17 miles… pretty huge for me, as previously the most I had ever done was about 6 miles at a time. I set off by about 7 AM from my hostel, as I knew I had several miles to walk before I even reached my destination:  I wanted to hike the mountainous jungle of Cabo Blanco to reach the secluded beach. It was a 9 kilometer walk just to get to the entrance of the Nature Preserve.

This lab joined me nearly from the beginning. I couldn’t believe he was walking with me such a long distance away from “home”, though I began to wonder if he even HAD a home, & perhaps he, too, often walked between towns…. (these towns in this more deserted part of CR, consisted of a few homes, & one grocery store).

This road paralleled the ocean, & at one point we came upon a surfer’s beach, about 2 miles into my walk. I saw a big log, & decided this would be a great place to take a break & have some water. Up to this point, Choco had been very friendly toward me, and very playful. As I was sitting there, enjoying the rest and the view … I became vaguely aware of a couple of men, not too far away from me, who seemed to be having a conversation.

Well, Choco began barking AT me. Acting very strangely.  I just KNEW something was up. I quickly decided to just pack up & head back out. As I was packing up, I was watching these men from the corner of my eye. One had pulled up in a car, and one had met him, coming up from the beach. They seemed to be getting heated in their conversation…. It honestly seemed to me like there was perhaps a drug deal going down. I was more than happy to get on my way. After that incident, Choco was just as sweet & playful as he’d been before, so I could only think, in amazement, that he had sensed I was in potential danger,  & had warned me to get going. He never left my side, the entire rest of the walk to the Nature Preserve.  At that point, sadly, I had to say goodbye to my faithful companion, as he could not enter the Preserve, and the very friendly park ranger offered to take him back to town.

As you can see, each & every time I encountered trouble, or potential sticky situations, there was a furry companion there to be my champion.  That is what got me thinking: Do Angels Wear Fur????


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Beauty of a Blog


Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder

How do you perceive yourself?

I was driving down the street recently and saw this sign, “I’m Beautiful Inside.” It was for a home for sale, but it really got me thinking. I wanted to write a blog about beauty.

Media creates an illusion of perfection that many people feel they must uphold in order to fit in. We all know this. At least, I hope at this point we realize it. I guess I should wonder most about the young ones. Maybe they don’t understand this yet.

I want to make dang sure everyone in MY circle gets it. Beauty truly is an “inside job”. Inner beauty simply radiates outward from a person. If you are happy on the inside, if you smile, if you have joy and peace bubbling up from your heart… your outer looks do not matter one iota. BELIEVE ME. I see it over and over and over. The kind of inner beauty I’m talking about is hard to miss. It has an “attraction factor” that many are drawn to, like moths to a flame.

How does one cultivate inner beauty? Through mindfulness practices and peace-inducing meditations.

What is mindfulness? Living life On Purpose. I would be so bold as to say multi-tasking is the enemy of mindful living.

“How to be a Zen Master: Do one thing at a time.” -Zen teaching.

We are so harried in today’s hyper-tech world, that we often feel we must do many things at once. The result? Life swooshes past so very rapidly. But that old saying, “Stop and smell the roses,” could not be more significantly important today. Mindful living can include some of the following:

Actually SIT DOWN to a meal. And actually put the phone away. Enjoy every bite, every nuance of texture and flavor in your food. Enjoy the person or people around you, enjoy the scenery. Take it all in. Chew each bite as if it were the first bite of human food you’ve ever had. Smell each food item and enjoy its aroma even before you put it in your mouth. TAKE YOUR TIME.

When driving, instead of “zoning out”, actually pay attention to the world around you. So often we drive like robots. We’ve been this way countless times. We arrive sometimes, and don’t even remember driving to our destination. Mindfulness practices are an excellent tool to exercise while driving. SEE the trees and buildings you are passing. Notice interesting details. You’d be surprised at what you observe. Pay attention to your body, your breath. Try and feel into your body, notice how the air moves in and out of your lungs. This is also a great time to practice positive mantras, like:

“I am a child of the Universe (or God, or whatever is your Source). I am loved and I am limitless.”

“I love myself, I accept myself, I will BE myself.”

“At my core is a deep well of calm.”

Cultivating inner peace and joy comes from taking just a few minutes each day to sit in a quiet place, try and clear the mind, and just… BE……..

Exercises for clearing the mind include:

Try to imagine your mind as the sky… clear as a bell. If (WHEN!) thoughts intrude, try to see them as clouds, and allow them to drift on and out of the “scene.”

Or imagine sitting by a stream, and thoughts that enter your peaceful solitude can be dropped into the stream like leaves; watch them float away.

A meditation practice can look many different ways. A walk with the dog before or after work is a great opportunity. But don’t let your mind get away with you. Pay attention to the way your feet hit the surface of the earth, pay attention to pretty flowers or bushes in the neighborhood along the way, appreciate the clouds, the trees, and wild critters.

If you do even one of the above exercises on a regular basis, you will cultivate an inner beauty that surpasses all understanding. You will even begin to look and feel younger. People will be asking you, “What’s your secret?”

Try it out today!





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Thanks for sharing your triumphs & set-backs, man.
We never give up, we never give in!

Eric unPublished (for now...)

I’m still here.
I’m still writing.
I’m still working on my craft, my passion, my dream.
It’s a challenge, a fight, a struggle at times.
I will not give up.
I will be still in the storm.
I will keep moving, even when that means falling and crawling and drifting backwards.
I shall not give up
I cannot give up.
I sit, I stall, I stumble, I step, I soar.
In the storm.
In the sun.
I’m still here.
I’m still writing.
I’m still working on my craft, my passion, my dream.
It’s a challenge, a fight, a struggle at times.
I will not give up.
I cannot give up.
In fact, truth is, I’m just gettin’ started.

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Dolores Cannon Teaching in the Dreamstate

I believe this to be true with my whole heart!
Fits right in with Holographic Earth.
LIVE IN JOY!!!!!!!
(& be healthy) :):)

New Earth Journey

Here is another dream communication I had from Dolores Cannon. Presented in classic Cannon form, straightforward and easy enough for anyone to understand. I hope you find the information beneficial.

Here is my dream!

Dolores, you are back! I am so happy to see you.

Yes I am back. (Laughing) It’s a lot of fun being multidimensional. You are multidimensional too you know, but its easier to understand and play with from where I am now. I am absolutely visiting many of my students and communicating. You just don’t know how much fun I am having!

Candace, I know you have always been especially interested in the physical healing of the body. There is so much I can tell you now about how all of that works.


Tonight I am going to describe something called “version states.” You keep within your energy field a variety of easily accessible set points…

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See A Red Bird. A QHHT Video Story Series!

This is so very exciting!

I do the same type of work Candace Craw-Goldman does, and it is so incredible!

Enjoy this trailer…. More excellent material to come!

Yay, Candace!!  ❤

See A Red Bird. A QHHT Video Story Series!

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A QHHT Christmas Story, Part 4

For the “enlightened” folk.

New Earth Journey

In Part 4 of this Quantum Healing Hypnosis Christmas Story, (all parts, including Part One and Part Two and Part Three can be read by clicking the links in this sentence) Jay provided some background information about the man, his traveling companions and from where he had come. He was describing the light that they followed and had a revelation he was about to share. He had said that “We have the story (of the Nativity) all wrong.”

Jay’s voice and demeanor changed at this point quite dramatically. He began to whisper and also to weep, silently, as he spoke. There were pauses in his description where he took deep breaths. He was literally vibrating and the air in the room also began to vibrate.

Jay: You must know this: The light, it was so unique, and so powerful. And it drew you in and it was…wait, we’ve gotten this…

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What is God’s Number?

THIS is an example of the amazing work QHHT Practitioners get to experience in our work. Simply synchronistically MAGICAL!!

New Earth Journey

The year was 2008. I had been practicing Dolores Cannon‘s method of hypnotic past life regression only a few months. As my client came off the cloud she said, “I must be making this up.”

I grinned to myself. I had heard this before and was not concerned. “Just tell me what you see, what you are experiencing.”

“I really MUST be making this up!” She said again. I watched her face twist around in confusion.

I grinned even more. This was the second session for my friend Nancy and in the previous one she had visited a crystal city on another planet somewhere else in the universe. She had already had an “out-of-this-world” experience that would be hard for many to believe. What could possibly have her questioning what was happening this time?

“Well, I am just standing here looking….at JESUS!”

Nancy probably was making the statement that…

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It is Now Time to Play BIG ~ A TAUK Message from Rabios and Suzanne Spooner

Such timely words of wisdom!!!

TAUK Messages


Hello Everyone,

Very rarely in my TAUK messages my guide Rabios comes through. When he does though they are always deep concepts, at least for me, haha. His energy feels very formal. I imagine him as an English chap who doesn’t cut up much, very on task for what he is here to share. He says he has never incarnated in a human body. His messages aren’t sugar coated as this one demonstrates. It may be challenging to accept the responsibility that he suggests but I think it certainly is worth contemplating. I hope you enjoy this one, you Master Creators! Much Love, Suzy

November 13, 2014

[Hi Rabios.] Hello Suzanne. Being in your light is how you manifest easiest. This will be our topic today. Finding what brings you joy is The Way of Love. If you give yourself permission to do what brings you joy, you will find…

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Wait a Minute!!


Oh the Pause…

One thing I have been working on lately is to try & remember to pause, just for a couple of beats, before answering a question.  Humans are in such a frenzied pace these days… we rush rush rush everywhere.  The fast-paced, technologically advancing world we live in leaves us in a whirl-wind of activity.  So if you’re like me, you rush to answer, rush to speak.

The problem with this?  Sometimes what comes out of our mouth may not be exactly what we intended.  What can come out when we are in too much of a hurry to speak?

Here’s a quote from Brian Adams:

Learn the art of patience. Apply discipline to your thoughts when they become anxious over the outcome of a goal. Impatience breeds anxiety, fear, discouragement and failure. Patience creates confidence, decisiveness and a rational outlook, which eventually leads to success.

Did you catch those words attached to impatience?  Fear, anxiety, discouragement & failure…

Yet patience (especially in our responses to others) breeds confidence, decisiveness, & a rational outlook… & thusly, success.  🙂

We have long forgotten the proverb:  “Patience is a virtue.”

Virtue, according to, means moral excellence, goodness, righteousness.

Sounds like something that might be helpful to have!  😉  And, as our quoted author above states, patience can in fact be an ART.  So begin to play with this concept in your mind.  Start taking a quick moment to think through your answer before you begin.  What’s sad is that people might think others a little “slow” when practicing this art… when in fact, they are far more WISE than others may suspect.

I’m going to really work on this.  Will you join me?

“Our patience will achieve more than our force.”    -Edmund Burke

If you enjoyed this posting, please feel free to share.  🙂

Also, if you’d like to learn how to get paid doing what I do… sharing your thoughts with the world, click  HERE.

Bright blessings!!

Shakti  ♥

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